Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Resting Place
Isaiah 32:18 And my people shall dwell in a peaceable habitation, and in sure dwellings, and in quiet resting places.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
The heart of women n men
I am snowed in!!!!!!!!!!...ummm, not really, I just hate driving in the snow. We have a few inches of snow at the end of march; which is pretty wierd :-S. Soooo I decided to continue reading my book "Captivating" while listening to some soul ... it's a really interesting read so far (I'm on page 21 lol). Just wanted to share what it says about what men and women really want.Heart of a woman
- wants to be romanced
- wants beauty to unveil
- wants an irreplaceable role in a great adventure
Heart of a man
- wants a battle to fight
- wants adventure
- wants a beauty to rescue-to offer strength on behalf of a woman
Very trueeeeee. Think about it..........ok, lemme continue :)
Here are some pics of the snow outside ma house
Brother's basketball hoop got knocked down earlier this week by the crazy wind!!! gotta love the midwest :/ Friday, March 27, 2009
Surround yourself with things and people that make you happy :-)
Life is too short! So live, laugh and love. Two weeks before my birthday, I decided to make a wish list of things I wanted and LOVED and surprisingly got some of them!!! As the word says "Ask and it shall be given unto you" abi?
One of the things I asked for which I absolutely love is the SOUL FOOD series (love african american movies/series) and I got the first season from a dear friend :))) so my girlfriends and I have been having some bonding time soul food sessions.
What makes you happy? Who makes you happy? - Keep yourselves close to them!!!
One of the things I asked for which I absolutely love is the SOUL FOOD series (love african american movies/series) and I got the first season from a dear friend :))) so my girlfriends and I have been having some bonding time soul food sessions.
What makes you happy? Who makes you happy? - Keep yourselves close to them!!!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Thankful Today :-p
I am sooo thankful for so much today........
-I woke up this morning with a smile on my face
-I had the time to read before bed last night
-I have friends and family that love me :-)...I suck at keepin' in touch and so I just want to thank all my lovelies that keep in touch through txts calls emails etc...love y'all
-I woke up this morning with a smile on my face
-I had the time to read before bed last night
-I have friends and family that love me :-)...I suck at keepin' in touch and so I just want to thank all my lovelies that keep in touch through txts calls emails etc...love y'all
-For Simple things is life :-)
-I have a FATHER who loves and supplies all my need (had a client in today that had nothing but $15 in his pocket, the dude used to earn over $2000)
-For protection, just turn on the news and see what is going on *shakes head*...I thank God
-For deliverance from street accidents (I was involved in 2 last year) so I thank baba God o :-)
-For the ability to get an education (even tho I am not feeling the whole thing right now lol)
-For the internet!!!!! weytin man go do without you LOL...I gave my laptop to someone dear because I think they'll need it more than I do right now...since then I have had tough nights, as I routinely sleep off watching my showsssssss (never know what u've got till it's gone I guess :))
There is soooooooo much more.......But I gtg...lunch was over 15 mins ago lol
I am Thankful For
Unknown Author
I AM Thankful:
FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.
F OR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.
FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED .
FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.
FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.
FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WALK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE
FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME
FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS
WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH.
FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION .
FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM.
FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I CAN HEAR.
FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.
FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.
FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.
AND I AM THANKFUL:
FOR THE crazy people I work with
BECAUSE they make work interesting and fun!
AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL
BECAUSE ? IT MEANS
I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.
Live well, Laugh often, & Love with all of your heart!
-I have a FATHER who loves and supplies all my need (had a client in today that had nothing but $15 in his pocket, the dude used to earn over $2000)
-For protection, just turn on the news and see what is going on *shakes head*...I thank God
-For deliverance from street accidents (I was involved in 2 last year) so I thank baba God o :-)
-For the ability to get an education (even tho I am not feeling the whole thing right now lol)
-For the internet!!!!! weytin man go do without you LOL...I gave my laptop to someone dear because I think they'll need it more than I do right now...since then I have had tough nights, as I routinely sleep off watching my showsssssss (never know what u've got till it's gone I guess :))
There is soooooooo much more.......But I gtg...lunch was over 15 mins ago lol
I am Thankful For
Unknown Author
I AM Thankful:
FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.
F OR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.
FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED .
FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.
FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.
FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WALK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE
FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME
FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS
WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH.
FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION .
FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM.
FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I CAN HEAR.
FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.
FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.
FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.
AND I AM THANKFUL:
FOR THE crazy people I work with
BECAUSE they make work interesting and fun!
AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL
BECAUSE ? IT MEANS
I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.
Live well, Laugh often, & Love with all of your heart!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Can you tell?
I'm in the mood for Disney inspirational songs... :-)
I will get there - Boy II Men
Go the distance - Michael Bolton
I will get there - Boy II Men
Go the distance - Michael Bolton
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Helmet Palava in Naija
Not been edited yet in case of grammatical errors LOL
I've been reading alot of blogs and also heard from friends that it is now compulsory to wear a helmet when you wan ride okada for Naija. I think the idea is GREAT but when it jeopardises ones health...then we have a problem NIGERIA!!!
Let's talk about head lice and all the diseases (both mental and physical)that could be transmitted by sharing these helmets now...Do the people have to carry headties/scarfs around to serve as a protection from the helmet lol.
Reading about this reminded me of my ONE AND ONLY OKADA/MOTORCYCLE experience. As an ajeborra...or watever you wanna call me - - - I CRIED. Yes, I cried!
It was a faithful day after one of my summer classes, myself and a bunch of friends decided to go chill at a friends place. She assured us that her driver will be around to take us home. Oya, na so we jump for moto...went to Mr. Biggs and then to her house...jisted...some sweet jist that I can still recall LOL...hmmm secondary skul days...chilled with some of the neighbors...I remember one was tryna toast me...lol...
anyways...we basically lost track of time because before we realised it, it was 8 O'clock and driver left at 7p :'-(. Ewooooooo, weytin go happen??? Her house was in Barnawa, mine was in Malali (about 30-45 minutes away). My mom/ pops will have had my head if I called them saying "I need a ride."
Na who send me oooo. The other girls were like...tor, we need to hail bus...I'm like OMG, I can't believe this is happening LOL...the bus was alright...Time to mount BIKE...my friends had to get one for me, made sure I was secure...and waved bye bye to me. I looked back at them like I would never see them again.
I held the railings of the bike behind me sooo tight because I was NOT about to hold on to the dude!!! I shed a few tears at the beginning then snapped out of it and enjoyed the breeze ( My brother was an okada rider and used to jist us how exhilarating it was)...so I decided to embrace it LOL
I asked him to drop me about 5 blocks from my house so the mai guard (gate keeper)did not see me (major amebo/snitch). What an experience it was...I went to school the next day and told my friends lol...one was so proud of me, he gave me money - too funny!!!
I've been reading alot of blogs and also heard from friends that it is now compulsory to wear a helmet when you wan ride okada for Naija. I think the idea is GREAT but when it jeopardises ones health...then we have a problem NIGERIA!!!
Let's talk about head lice and all the diseases (both mental and physical)that could be transmitted by sharing these helmets now...Do the people have to carry headties/scarfs around to serve as a protection from the helmet lol.
Reading about this reminded me of my ONE AND ONLY OKADA/MOTORCYCLE experience. As an ajeborra...or watever you wanna call me - - - I CRIED. Yes, I cried!
It was a faithful day after one of my summer classes, myself and a bunch of friends decided to go chill at a friends place. She assured us that her driver will be around to take us home. Oya, na so we jump for moto...went to Mr. Biggs and then to her house...jisted...some sweet jist that I can still recall LOL...hmmm secondary skul days...chilled with some of the neighbors...I remember one was tryna toast me...lol...
anyways...we basically lost track of time because before we realised it, it was 8 O'clock and driver left at 7p :'-(. Ewooooooo, weytin go happen??? Her house was in Barnawa, mine was in Malali (about 30-45 minutes away). My mom/ pops will have had my head if I called them saying "I need a ride."
Na who send me oooo. The other girls were like...tor, we need to hail bus...I'm like OMG, I can't believe this is happening LOL...the bus was alright...Time to mount BIKE...my friends had to get one for me, made sure I was secure...and waved bye bye to me. I looked back at them like I would never see them again.
I held the railings of the bike behind me sooo tight because I was NOT about to hold on to the dude!!! I shed a few tears at the beginning then snapped out of it and enjoyed the breeze ( My brother was an okada rider and used to jist us how exhilarating it was)...so I decided to embrace it LOL
I asked him to drop me about 5 blocks from my house so the mai guard (gate keeper)did not see me (major amebo/snitch). What an experience it was...I went to school the next day and told my friends lol...one was so proud of me, he gave me money - too funny!!!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
To be CONTENT!
Content: 1. Desiring no more than what one has; satisfied. 2. Ready to accept or acquiesce; willing
But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. (1 Timothy 6:6-8)
The other night I attended a meeting at a fellow church member’s house. The hospitality was warm and inviting. The decor was lovely and from around the globe. The size … well, let’s just say you could fit my entire apartment in their living room and kitchen.
When this fruitful meeting was over, I drove back to my humble home, and felt plagued by a nagging sense of lack. This space that had seemed so secure and cozy and delightfully mine just hours before suddenly felt different. I knew it was silly and shallow, but I still felt a bit discontent.
And then I remembered the words of one of the students in an English as a Second Language class I’d volunteered with years earlier. When this refugee discovered I lived alone in a nearby apartment, he blurted, “You have an entire apartment all to yourself?”
I was humbled then. And I was again on remembering his words. I’m not a have-not; I’m a have, I told myself. My basic human needs are more than met. I’m blessed. I have every reason to be grateful.
And content.
But it’s hard to hang onto that perspective when you see others who have more. When you watch commercials that can make you feel incomplete without the latest toothpaste or SUV. When you lose a job and your notion of “enough” is challenged.
Thankfully, the Bible helps us right our perspective—with the 1 Timothy passage above, with Paul’s inspiring words about contentment in Philippians 4:12, with the reminder in Matthew 6:25-34 that life is about so much more than “stuff.”
Here are some other ways to cultivate contentment:
1. Read the passages listed in the paragraph above. Make a list of what you learn about the keys to and rewards of contentment.
2. For a reminder of all the ways you’ve been blessed, make a list of 50 things in your life for which you’re grateful.
3. When we’re content with what we have, we’re freed up to give to others. Clean out a drawer or a closet or your food pantry this week, gather items you don’t need, and give them to a local shelter.
4. Post the word contentment or one of the verses listed above in a place where you’re often tempted to feel discontent: on the dashboard of your older car, near your television or computer, in your closet.
5. Think of contentment-stealers in your life—such as television or fashion magazines—and choose to eliminate some of these things from your life.
6. Ask God to forgive you of any discontent that’s been plaguing you. And ask him to fill you instead with a contented and grateful heart.
7. If you’re dealing with serious lack in your life—losing a home, facing a serious health threat, mourning a loved one’s passing—ask a trusted Christian friend, a pastor, or a counselor to pray with you, walk with you, and help you find the peace that passes all understanding.
8. For more insights on contentment, read: “Living on Less—and Loving It” and “An Attitude of Gratitude.”
Share ways you cultivate contentment.
From http://www.christianitytoday.com/tcw/ :-)
But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. (1 Timothy 6:6-8)
The other night I attended a meeting at a fellow church member’s house. The hospitality was warm and inviting. The decor was lovely and from around the globe. The size … well, let’s just say you could fit my entire apartment in their living room and kitchen.
When this fruitful meeting was over, I drove back to my humble home, and felt plagued by a nagging sense of lack. This space that had seemed so secure and cozy and delightfully mine just hours before suddenly felt different. I knew it was silly and shallow, but I still felt a bit discontent.
And then I remembered the words of one of the students in an English as a Second Language class I’d volunteered with years earlier. When this refugee discovered I lived alone in a nearby apartment, he blurted, “You have an entire apartment all to yourself?”
I was humbled then. And I was again on remembering his words. I’m not a have-not; I’m a have, I told myself. My basic human needs are more than met. I’m blessed. I have every reason to be grateful.
And content.
But it’s hard to hang onto that perspective when you see others who have more. When you watch commercials that can make you feel incomplete without the latest toothpaste or SUV. When you lose a job and your notion of “enough” is challenged.
Thankfully, the Bible helps us right our perspective—with the 1 Timothy passage above, with Paul’s inspiring words about contentment in Philippians 4:12, with the reminder in Matthew 6:25-34 that life is about so much more than “stuff.”
Here are some other ways to cultivate contentment:
1. Read the passages listed in the paragraph above. Make a list of what you learn about the keys to and rewards of contentment.
2. For a reminder of all the ways you’ve been blessed, make a list of 50 things in your life for which you’re grateful.
3. When we’re content with what we have, we’re freed up to give to others. Clean out a drawer or a closet or your food pantry this week, gather items you don’t need, and give them to a local shelter.
4. Post the word contentment or one of the verses listed above in a place where you’re often tempted to feel discontent: on the dashboard of your older car, near your television or computer, in your closet.
5. Think of contentment-stealers in your life—such as television or fashion magazines—and choose to eliminate some of these things from your life.
6. Ask God to forgive you of any discontent that’s been plaguing you. And ask him to fill you instead with a contented and grateful heart.
7. If you’re dealing with serious lack in your life—losing a home, facing a serious health threat, mourning a loved one’s passing—ask a trusted Christian friend, a pastor, or a counselor to pray with you, walk with you, and help you find the peace that passes all understanding.
8. For more insights on contentment, read: “Living on Less—and Loving It” and “An Attitude of Gratitude.”
Share ways you cultivate contentment.
From http://www.christianitytoday.com/tcw/ :-)
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Nawa o
I am so over my limit for text msging the mth :-(...and people keep texting me.
I got numerous numbers of the same disturbing texts today that say
"Do not go to any Walmart tonight. Gang initiation to shoot three women tonight. Not sure which Walmart and confirmed on local news."
What the heck? I don't understand why gang members and occultists have to involve innocent people in their crazy rituals. What about the women who have to work at Walmart tonight? Are they gonna have to send them home?
This is really crazy...hmmm...it is well! Poor Walmart will loose alot of money today.
I quickly called home to inform them as thurdays are our "banana days" LOL (discount on bananas)
We live in such a crazy world and it is only God that can help and protect us.
Rest in His bossoms :-)
I got numerous numbers of the same disturbing texts today that say
"Do not go to any Walmart tonight. Gang initiation to shoot three women tonight. Not sure which Walmart and confirmed on local news."
What the heck? I don't understand why gang members and occultists have to involve innocent people in their crazy rituals. What about the women who have to work at Walmart tonight? Are they gonna have to send them home?
This is really crazy...hmmm...it is well! Poor Walmart will loose alot of money today.
I quickly called home to inform them as thurdays are our "banana days" LOL (discount on bananas)
We live in such a crazy world and it is only God that can help and protect us.
Rest in His bossoms :-)
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
30 commandments to being the perfect wife for a nigerian man
If you have 5min to spare ….read this and have a laugh!!
P.s... i stole it from somewhere...TOO FUNNY :-D
1. Thou shall NOT be a LONG TINS BABE (you know what I mean?)
2. Thou shall not lack in boobs, yansh and hips. If you must, please lack only one and find a way to make up for it.
3. Thou shall NOT be a down to earth, real or ride or die chick. I.e all those ruff, rugged and raw "tell it as it is" girls, NOT WERKING.
4. Thou shall not have dew hair (All those afro/afro-kinky "soul" sisters… FORGET IT).
5. Thou shall not be a non-church goer. Ladies, for extra credit, be an usher, Sunday school aunty or PRAYER WARRIOR (This applies to other religious sects)
6. Thou shall not go to club to find husband... YOU GO JONZ!!
7. Thou shall not drink hard liquor or beers. Stick to 2 glasses of wine, IF YOU MUST DRINK ALCHOHOL
8. Thou shall not have un-manicured nails (It has to be French manicure acrylic nails).
9. Thou shall not have daddy issues (victims of divorced parents and dysfunctional families … keep it to yourselves).
10. Thou shall not go without makeup (i.e. caked foundation, studio fix but ensure that the make up has a natural look which is purple lip liner, pink lip gloss and chocolate/natural eye shadows)
11. Thou shall not lack culinary skills. Perfect the art of egusi, ogbono and all variations of rice. Home Economics is in order
12. Thou shall not be a "posh sturvs". Sushi or lasagne…uh ..Really?
13. Thou shall not knack ya head when you have a weave. Futhermore, on no account should you be caught scratching and flicking the condiments into thin air. That is simply DISGUSTING.
14. Thou shall not do any strange degrees, such as development, journalism or medical genetics. Ladies, stick to law, engineering, accounting, business or pharmacy.
15. Thou shall not have a sense of humour or try to even be funny (note: SARCASM IS A NO NO)
16. Ultimately, thou shall not go past a first degree, maybe masters (PHD IS AN ABORMINATION)
17. If thou must study a masters, please please, remember to dumb down when hanging with his friends.
18. Thou shall not disclose too much of yourself. You will seem needy
19. Thou SHALL NOT have a sex life or sexual imagination prior to meeting him. Let him "teach" you.
20. Thou shall not listen to anything other than r'n'b or hip hop (common is pushing it). All you World music and rock chicks, NOT HAPPENING MATE).
21. Thou shall NOT be an independent woman. (all those "I can pay my own bills" bullshit… Basically , LONG TINS). Refer to commandment one!
22. Thou shall not be opinionated or well informed (WARNING: This might come off as intimidating. Besides, no one likes a miss know it all).
23. Thou shall not go to any obscure University. Please stick to Kent, Leicester, Nottingham, and Reading. (WARNING- YOU WILL END UP ALONE).
24. Thou shall not be overly friendly. All those social butterflies and jovial. Personalities…BEWARE.
25. Thou shall not be anti-social when it comes to his family. You have to GET IN THERE FULLY.
26. Thou shall not explore any originality when it comes to fashion. Stick to T.M Lewin, Hawes&Curtis, pointies or kitten heels, and jeans – Abortion belt always puts the icing on the cake. To complete the look, don't be seen without your thick framed rectangular glasses (YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE TO SPECSAVERS).
27. Thou shall not hunt in packs (warning to girls with bossom bodies that cant be separated
28. Thou shall NOT be loud. Keep your voice to a minimum always
29. Thou shall not appear to be having too much fun on the dance floor. When it comes to dancing, keep it simple (Dutty winders and grinders, ITS NOT HAPPENING).
30. Thou shall not think about breaking this next commandment. The ULTIMATE, IF NOT YOU ARE FINISHED....It Will be an OYO STATE (on you own) FOR YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.....
LADIES PLEASE PLEASE AND PLEASE DO NOT GO TO THE BEDROOM WITH ANY WRAPPER, NIGHT SHIRT, WHITE TOP GEL OR SHELLY ON YOUR FACE. If you must Do all the above, LADIES, BURN THOSE GOLD AND BLACK HAIR NETS.
Girls, we are all guilty of owning a hair net or 2. And we know that all the commandments before suggests that you must be a babe on POINT constantly.
You have to FIND A WAY TO WORK AROUND THIS HAIR NET ISSUES. Statistics dictates that one in two marriages FAIL due to this.
GOODLUCK!!!!
P.s... i stole it from somewhere...TOO FUNNY :-D
1. Thou shall NOT be a LONG TINS BABE (you know what I mean?)
2. Thou shall not lack in boobs, yansh and hips. If you must, please lack only one and find a way to make up for it.
3. Thou shall NOT be a down to earth, real or ride or die chick. I.e all those ruff, rugged and raw "tell it as it is" girls, NOT WERKING.
4. Thou shall not have dew hair (All those afro/afro-kinky "soul" sisters… FORGET IT).
5. Thou shall not be a non-church goer. Ladies, for extra credit, be an usher, Sunday school aunty or PRAYER WARRIOR (This applies to other religious sects)
6. Thou shall not go to club to find husband... YOU GO JONZ!!
7. Thou shall not drink hard liquor or beers. Stick to 2 glasses of wine, IF YOU MUST DRINK ALCHOHOL
8. Thou shall not have un-manicured nails (It has to be French manicure acrylic nails).
9. Thou shall not have daddy issues (victims of divorced parents and dysfunctional families … keep it to yourselves).
10. Thou shall not go without makeup (i.e. caked foundation, studio fix but ensure that the make up has a natural look which is purple lip liner, pink lip gloss and chocolate/natural eye shadows)
11. Thou shall not lack culinary skills. Perfect the art of egusi, ogbono and all variations of rice. Home Economics is in order
12. Thou shall not be a "posh sturvs". Sushi or lasagne…uh ..Really?
13. Thou shall not knack ya head when you have a weave. Futhermore, on no account should you be caught scratching and flicking the condiments into thin air. That is simply DISGUSTING.
14. Thou shall not do any strange degrees, such as development, journalism or medical genetics. Ladies, stick to law, engineering, accounting, business or pharmacy.
15. Thou shall not have a sense of humour or try to even be funny (note: SARCASM IS A NO NO)
16. Ultimately, thou shall not go past a first degree, maybe masters (PHD IS AN ABORMINATION)
17. If thou must study a masters, please please, remember to dumb down when hanging with his friends.
18. Thou shall not disclose too much of yourself. You will seem needy
19. Thou SHALL NOT have a sex life or sexual imagination prior to meeting him. Let him "teach" you.
20. Thou shall not listen to anything other than r'n'b or hip hop (common is pushing it). All you World music and rock chicks, NOT HAPPENING MATE).
21. Thou shall NOT be an independent woman. (all those "I can pay my own bills" bullshit… Basically , LONG TINS). Refer to commandment one!
22. Thou shall not be opinionated or well informed (WARNING: This might come off as intimidating. Besides, no one likes a miss know it all).
23. Thou shall not go to any obscure University. Please stick to Kent, Leicester, Nottingham, and Reading. (WARNING- YOU WILL END UP ALONE).
24. Thou shall not be overly friendly. All those social butterflies and jovial. Personalities…BEWARE.
25. Thou shall not be anti-social when it comes to his family. You have to GET IN THERE FULLY.
26. Thou shall not explore any originality when it comes to fashion. Stick to T.M Lewin, Hawes&Curtis, pointies or kitten heels, and jeans – Abortion belt always puts the icing on the cake. To complete the look, don't be seen without your thick framed rectangular glasses (YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE TO SPECSAVERS).
27. Thou shall not hunt in packs (warning to girls with bossom bodies that cant be separated
28. Thou shall NOT be loud. Keep your voice to a minimum always
29. Thou shall not appear to be having too much fun on the dance floor. When it comes to dancing, keep it simple (Dutty winders and grinders, ITS NOT HAPPENING).
30. Thou shall not think about breaking this next commandment. The ULTIMATE, IF NOT YOU ARE FINISHED....It Will be an OYO STATE (on you own) FOR YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.....
LADIES PLEASE PLEASE AND PLEASE DO NOT GO TO THE BEDROOM WITH ANY WRAPPER, NIGHT SHIRT, WHITE TOP GEL OR SHELLY ON YOUR FACE. If you must Do all the above, LADIES, BURN THOSE GOLD AND BLACK HAIR NETS.
Girls, we are all guilty of owning a hair net or 2. And we know that all the commandments before suggests that you must be a babe on POINT constantly.
You have to FIND A WAY TO WORK AROUND THIS HAIR NET ISSUES. Statistics dictates that one in two marriages FAIL due to this.
GOODLUCK!!!!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Financial Spring Cleaning
It was 86 degress outside today :-)...I felt the sun on my skin and the breeze in my face...I really hope it stays this way...For many Americans, the onset of spring and fresh air outside means spring cleaning inside. It's time to swap winter clothes for spring/summer ones and to get rid of the dust and clutter that's built up over the cold months. Spring also is a great time to put your finances in order and save money in the process. The National Foundation for Credit Counseling (NFCC) suggests the following tips for tidying up your finances.
Get to know your credit report better. Dedicate spring cleaning time as the annual time to review your credit report, which you can get for free at http://www.annualcreditreport.com/ or by calling (877) 322-8228. A credit report contains information about your credit and loan history including amounts and payment history and is used extensively by potential lenders to evaluate your credit worthiness. Read each report carefully as there may be discrepancies between the three credit bureaus. Also, check for negative information such as civil judgments, tax liens or Chapter 7 and 13 bankruptcies. If you find errors, file a dispute with the credit bureau.
Clean up bad credit. Fixing bad credit is about getting back on track by paying bills on time and budgeting and using credit wisely. At the first sign of a late or missed payment inform creditors of your present situation and how you plan to resolve your financial problems. If you have a good payment history, you may be able to negotiate your next payment. Pay down the credit cards and loans with the highest interest rates first. If you can't pay off your monthly credit card balance in full, at least resolve to pay more than the minimum while you work off the debt.
Throw away old paperwork. You can shred ATM receipts and bank deposits after appearing on bank statements. Pay stubs also can be shredded after matching them with your year-end statement. In fact, properly disposing of these can help prevent identity theft. You don't need to keep your utility statements if you've already paid them. After checking to make sure your credit card statement is accurate and you have paid the bill, you can shred your credit card statements. To prevent identity theft when tossing out paperwork at home, the NFCC recommends using a paper shredder, available at your local office supply store. You also can check with your local bank to see if they offer free shredding throughout the year.
Go paperless. One additional way to cut down on the paperwork is to opt for electronic bills to be sent to your password-protected email. Decreasing the number of bills sent to your home also can help fight identity theft. Identity theft is the nation's fastest growing crime with about 19 people becoming a new victim every minute, according to the Identity Theft Resource Center. Make sure to keep your passwords safe and your online bill payment method secure. Contact the following if you think your identity has been stolen: Equifax 1-800-685-1111, Experian 1-800-397-3742, TransUnion 1-800-888-4213 and FTC 1-877-438-4338.
Consolidate the clutter. Not knowing where anything is can result in multiple purchases of the same items. Keeping a place for everything and putting everything in its place can save you time and money in the future. Harris Interactive, the 12th largest and fastestgrowing market research firm in the world, found that 23 percent of adults say they pay bills late - and thus incur fees - because they lose the bills. In addition to substantial late fees, misplacing bills could potentially lower your credit score.
Decrease the plastic in your wallet. Limit the number of credit cards you own and carry. Use just one card if you can - the fewer you have, the easier it is to remember your balance and keep track of total purchases. If you're unsure which credit cards to cancel, carefully read your monthly statements to check out the annual fee, the interest rate you'll pay and any charges for overdue payments or going over your credit limit.
Ask an expert. If you don't know where to start or you're not sure what to keep or toss, consider contacting an NFCC member agency. From financial education to debt management services, NFCC's nonprofit agencies have certified credit counselors who offer low-cost and free financial educational information, money and credit management advice and debt reduction services.
Check out http://www.nfcc.org/ for more information.
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